Top Five

Top 5 headlines we aren't likely to see anytime soon :

5 - Ariel Sharon admits to torrid homosexual love affair with Chairman Arafat.
4 - Poll shows 80% support in France for US foreign policy.
3 - Saddam Hussein admits UN weapons inspectors, calls for elections, converts to Judiasm.
2 - Bill Bennett admits to torrid homosexual love affair with Chairman Arafat.
And the number 1 headline we aren't likely to see anytime soon :
Colin Powell proposes nuclear strike on Gaza; says he is "slavering for the blood of innocents".